I find myself saying it a lot here recently: “I have no idea what to do with my life.” Juggling classes, work, volunteering, and searching for jobs, all while trying to nail down a graduation date (it will happen), that’s my succinct and hyperbolic way of saying “I need a plan.” For those of you familiar with the Myers-Briggs personality test, I’m about a 90% J. I need to have a solid plan, and I need that plan to not change.
So, my classes are set; I know what each of my two remaining semesters will look like. But I’m not sure whether or not to pursue an internship this summer, so I don’t know which semesters they are. The beauty of being a student assistant is that my boss is the one in charge of the planning, and I simply tackle the more menial tasks of day-to-day office life. But still, it takes time. Homework takes time, work takes time, job hunting takes time.
And I begin to wonder, what am I doing with the time I have? Nobody lives forever; those who have lost people close to them are acutely aware of that. Will I die wondering if I wasted all my time planning and forgetting to actually do? It is with all these thoughts floating around in my head that I turn to Jesus and almost too eagerly throw them at His feet. Jesus, take the wheeeeel. And then I pick them back up one by one, because as powerful as He is, Jesus won’t do my fluids homework for me.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – I have no idea what to do with my life. I want a lot of things; I even need a few of them. But only Christ can give me a plan for what really matters – eternal peace and security. He may not do my homework for me, or go to class for me, or fill out job applications for me, but He died for me. He loves me that much so that I can, every once in a while, look at the pages of to-do lists and say, “I may not know what to do, but I know who I’m doing it for.”